A FEW OF MY ALL TIME FAVORITE POEMS
Any Answers?
Our teacher had finished our lesson.
We'd learned about fractions since lunch.
She asked if we had any questions.
I answered her, "Yes, here's a bunch."
"Do horses on islands wear sandals?
Did Romans have boats that they rowed?
Are oak trees permitted on Elm Street?
Can frogs become friends with a toad?
Are negative numbers unhappy?
Do kings wear their crowns when they sleep?
Does crossing a T make it angry?
Why would a year have to leap?
I know they invented the yardstick,
But how did they measure success?
And how did they ship all the ponies,
That worked for the Pony Express?
If people went fishing on Saturn,
Would earthworms be useful as bait?
Are walls sometimes awful in China,
The big one they've got there is great!
My dog ate some lightning bugs Tuesday,
So how come his stomach won't glow?"
My questions went on for an hour.
I stopped when our class was dismissed.
This morning I'm glad that it's Monday,
So I can continue my list.
But here we all sit with no teacher.
Does this put an end to my quest?
Miss Brown's on an unplanned vacation.
She suddenly needed some rest!
--Jeff Mondak
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What I Found in My Desk
by Bruce Lansky
A ripe peach with a ugly bruise,
a pair of stinky tennis shoes,
a day-old ham-and-cheese on rye,
a swimsuit that I left to dry,
a pencil that glows in the dark,
some bubble gum found in the park,
a paper bag with cookie crumbs,
an old kazoo that barely hums,
a spelling test I almost failed,
a letter that I should have mailed,
and one more thing, I must confess,
a note from teacher: Clean This Mess!!!!
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Too Busy
by Bruce Lansky
I've folded all my laundry
and put it in the drawer.
I've changed my linen, made my bed,
and swept my bedroom floor.
I've emptied out the garbage
and fixed tomorrow's lunch.
I've baked some cookies for dessert
and given Dad a munch.
I've searched the house for pencils
and sharpened every one.
There are so many things to do
when homework must be done.
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Hand-Me-Downs
by Bob Zanger
I'm always wearing hand-me-downs.
I don't get stuff that's new.
My mom won't take me shopping.
I don't know what to do.
The dresses always fit me fine,
but high heels give me blisters.
It's not easy growing up,
a boy with older sisters.
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Turn Off the TV!
by Bruce Lansky
My father gets quite mad at me;
my mother gets upset--
when they catch me watching
our new television set.
My father yells, "Turn that thing off!"
Mom says, "It's time to study."
I'd rather watch my favorite TV show
with my best buddy.
I sneak down after homework
and turn the set on low.
But when she sees me watching it,
my mom yells out, "No!"
Dad says, "If you don't turn it off,
I'll hang it from a tree!"
I rather doubt he'll do it,
'cause he watches more than me.
He watches sports all weekend,
and weekday evenings too,
while munching chips and pretzels--
the room looks like a zoo.
So if he ever got the nerve
to hang it from a tree,
he'd spend a lot of time up there--
watching it with me.
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Don't Bring Camels in the Classroom
by Kenn Nesbitt
Don't bring camels in the classroom.
Don't bring scorpions to school.
Don't bring rhinos, rats, or reindeer.
Don't bring mice or moose or mule.
Pull your penguin off the playground.
Put your python in a tree.
Place your platypus wherever
you think platypi should be.
Lose your leopard and your lemur.
Leave your llama and your leech.
Take your tiger, toad, and toucan
anywhere but where they teach.
Send your wombat and your weasel
with your wasp and wolverine.
Hide your hedgehog and hyena
where you're sure they won't be seen.
Please get rid of your gorilla.
Please kick out your kangaroo.
No, the teacher didn't mean it
when she called the class a "zoo". |
First Do No Harm
My snowman caught a cold today
His carrot nose was runny
I fed him Grandma's chicken soup
And tea with milk and honey
But all this did was make him melt
He's worse instead of better
I guess next time I'll skip the soup
And lend him Grandpa's sweater
--Jeff Mondak
Sick
"I cannot go to school today,"
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
"I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
My mouth is wet, my throat is dry,
I'm going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I've counted sixteen chicken pox.
And there's one more-that's seventeen,
And don't you think my face looks green?
My leg is cut, my eyes are blue-
It might be instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,
I'm sure that my left leg is broke-
My hip hurts when I move my chin,
My belly button's caving in,
My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,
My 'pendix pains each time it rains.
My nose is cold, my toes are numb,
I have a sliver in my thumb.
My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,
I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,
I think my hair is falling out.
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,
My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,
There is a hole inside my ear.
I have a hangnail, and my heart is -what?
What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is ......Saturday?
G'bye, I'm going out to play!"
By: Shel Silverstein
"BUZZ BACK TO HOME PAGE!"
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